Let’s talk about Fred. The guy who made me use all my school fees to secure my life. The reason I have never graduated.
He didn’t even love me as I expected. He was pretentious, for so long and I couldn’t even see that or rather opted not to. Naive? Maybe.. .He eventually slipped and I got to see him for who he was but I still held on to a falling brach. Seeing the good in people and all, huh right! Lemme tell you what tipped the balance, what made me doubt his goodness.
That Thursday I didn’t feel like going to work so I called the administrator, told her I wasn’t feeling well and that I might not make it to the office. See,I was working and taking part time classes. Sick indeed! I was more than fine, in the comfort of my home. I dressed up and headed to Fred’s house. At home I was so fine I dressed up and headed to Fred’s house. Fred was my boyfriend, no, my side guy. My boyfriend was Collo at that moment ,he was a silent guy so we were less of friends, Instead, I spent most of my time with Fred. I got to his place at exactly 8a.m earlier than my everyday work time. Fred made breakfast for two, we ate and started watching a movie. What I enjoyed most about Fred is that he was quite talkative and a great listener. What a combo. We would always have this long talks and that day was no different. We watched and talked until around 11 a.m. He asked me whether I’ll cook lunch and I was okay with it. Fred went out to the butchery to get some meat while I got into the kitchen to begin the preparations.
For the first time ever, i found my clothes quite irritating. I love dressing up, i wear only what apeases my inner diva,so this was new to me. Here i was in the kitchen sweating up and itchy. My blouse had to go so i headed for the wardrobe, his wardrobe. I had two dresses in there for emergency situations. Wait, those ain’t mine, I thought as I opened the wardrobe. The black laced panties on top of my dresses weren’t mine.
I couldn’t believe my eyes. My body turned numb, wasn’t sure I had legs anymore because I couldn’t feel them. I needed to pack it. I lay on the bed, dissappointed, the energy to cook drained from me.
Fred came in and found me on the bed. He asked what was wrong I told him I was feeling dizzy. He laid me down properly, spread the sheet over my body and went ahead to cook lunch. In my heart I felt like telling him but I didn’t know where to begin with. I held up tears in my eyes as a lump rose in my throat. Talking wasn’t an option at the moment .My heart was so heavy. Questions ringing in my head “whose could they be? ” “but Fred has been single all along” . I was restless. Fred brought in lunch and forced me to eat but unfortunately I couldn’t. Instead I chose to sleep.
I woke up at around 4:30pm and found Fred besides the bed staring at me. He asked me if I was okay, gave me warm milk and some cookies. I tried eating those and we started talking again, we went on to the bedroom balcony to talk more. “Now tell me, what’s bothering you? I know it’s not dizziness you just look restless ” as he was posing his questions I heard the front door opening and footprints coming towards us. He still talked. The footprints walked to the bedroom and finally the balcony. I couldn’t face up but I saw a lady’s shadow.
She didn’t say anything she just went back to the living room.
“Fred who is she? ”
“How does she get in your house like that? To the bedroom? ”
“Well, she was dating my brother and they were staying here so she has some clothes that she’s come to pick”
“Oooh, okay, let her get in I will wait in the living room ”
I went out as he tried to pull me back. I said hi she never replied,she passed by me like I was non existent and went to the bedroom where Fred was then in. At first I heard her mummering in complains then she started whispering aloud. I could feel her pain and concluded it was not the brother that left her, it could be Fred who has just broken her heart because of me. I decided to go in and take my coat, dressed up to go away. Part of me didn’t want to and Fred tried to stop me. The lady was crying inside, tears flowing uncontrollably. I sat down to tie my shoe laces for 30 good minutes where it only took ten minutes normally . The lady was in pain and Fred was trying to console her.
He assumed I had left but alas. I overheard him say “there is nothing going on between me and her ” , I couldn’t hear more, I had to leave. I called for an Uber to drive me from Moi Avenue to Mtwapa, not caring how much it would cost. I had to leave…
To be continued…