Have I ever told you how I held on to a falling branch of a tree until it was three quarters broken? Ouh I did. You’d say I was quite silly, but I didn’t learn my lesson yet. So I held on to a Moha for that long. Long enough to make his wife plead with me to leave him, long enough to make them name their kid after me, long enough now to becoming too much and make Moha’s mother look for me because of spoiling her son’s brains. She thought I bewitched or spelled some kind of charm In him. But it wasn’t my fault was it? I know you wouldn’t believe but I do not know this Moha dude. I had never met him and never yet still.
Moha is a family friend. We just happened to have mutual friends in facebook who happen to be our cousins. Let us call this cousin Kezi. She is not part of our story. So Kezi’s mother is related to my mother, and Kezi’s father is related to Moha’s. So now Moha came to facebook messenger as a cousin. His inbox was straight forward.
“Hey, do you know Kezi? ”
“yes I do, do you know her? “, considering Kezi was a very silent introvert who wasn’t even a fan of social media, being known by people from facebook meant that he knew her on a personal level.
“yeah, she is my cousin. Our fathers are brothers”
“Ooh, okay, she is my cousin too. Our mothers are sisters”
“Ouh, nice. You stay at the coast? How comes I’ve never seen you even once? We used to stay there back when I was in primary school ”
So this conversation was a long interesting one. At that age and time. Immediately after form four where I have nothing to do nowhere to go. I just received my new phone from dad and I had just joined facebook. I knew no men because growing up I attended girls’school only since primary school. My life was about getting out at six in the morning and coming back home at eight at night after madrasa. Even the neighbouring shopkeeper thought I was in a boarding school, coz he hardly saw me around. Facebook was the only place I could talk to people and maybe make new friends comfortably thinking that they are my class just because they type good English. I didn’t know about auto-correct. By the way, I have a pet peeve with bad grammar. Just so you know. At that time, I had broken up with a highschool crush who was our neighbor. One reason was because I feared my parents seeing us together at the shop greeting each other. I’d be slaughtered and made berbercue for the rest of the year till Christmas. This boy is the one who made my love for literature get here. Disclaimer, he was not a luo. He just loved boasting about how much language he knows, how good his school was and bla bla bla because all his cousins were those who’d come to their place on holidays with the feeling of ‘at least we are going to have sausages and omelettes for breakfast for this whole month’. In his circle of cousins, they were the rich cousins. He had to prove that to me by the weight of English words he used whenever we chat. Little did he know I made good use of my dictionary then. I will forever be grateful to him because he made me learn alot. I didn’t want to seem like a girl who only know basics, so I’d always do my research about grammar and literature. He wrote me poems sometimes, and that’s what brought me to the writing platform. Mkimuona Willy msalimieni.
The conversation with Moha would’ve been boring if it came now but trust me, as naïve as I was, I needed it. I got it. We became friends. I didn’t remember to ask Kezi if she knew Moha until the following year around Valentine’s when I had blindly fallen in Moha’s box, is when I started blushing whenever I hear the word boyfriend being mentioned.
“by the way, Kezi, do you know Moha? ”
“Mmmmmmh, what’s wrong with him? “I tell you Kezi wasn’t happy with my friendship with Moha. She wished she could tell me to stop talking to him but it was too late, we were dating and I was too dumb to even read the expression on her face. Kezi’s older sister looked kinda excited and at that point it was only those positive vibes that mattered to me. I’m in a new relationship. Nobody knows. They just suspected I had a crush on him.
My first long distance relationship experience is what defined my attachment to my phone 24/7,facebook. It is what made me active for all that long before I decided to take Moha’s number to normal text. I was afraid of texting him. What if mum saw the messages? What if people at home know his number? Facebook should be a safe place. We went on with facebook until one day in August. At 9pm as usual when I was chatting with Moha, I received a new message from (I really don’t remember her name) call her Kate. She is among those people who call themselves funny experiments or chemicals names.
“Hey, please stop chatting with my baby”
“Huh? “what do you mean? Who is your baby? ”
“You know him, Moha. He is chatting with you now and I’m right here besides him. Kindly stop”
I don’t know, but I found the text very polite. Especially when she said please. I’m not sure if it was or I was just still naïve.
“Mmmh, okay, if you are there with him you can just tell him to stop replying ”
“I know you don’t believe me. (she sent a selfie of her and Moha facing the other side. In one bed). I have told him to stop but he won’t listen. Kindly, as a fellow lady put yourself in my shoes and let him sleep ”
Now I’m confused, after seeing the photo. I log out of facebook. Moha calls, I missed almost five calls and went back to facebook. I think I didn’t have whatsApp yet. So I text Moha.
“your lady has told me to stop chatting with you, so you go on sleep and never talk to me. Ever!”
“Ouh cm’on,who is that? Which lady?”
I mentioned the username.
“leave that one alone”
I sent the photo.
“what?! Let me deal with her”
“Oooh, she exists. Who is she?”
“she is just a random girl here who wants me by force”
“but you are in the same bed… Who forced who? Whose house is it? Who is this person. Look, I do not know you. I have never met you. We have dated for these seven months I’m glad to have known you I do not want any problems with my family. Have a nice life”
I logged out of facebook and did not cry. I wasn’t even as heart broken as I was scared of my parents knowing about all this. I was eighteen then and I didn’t even know what a boyfriend is.
The following morning I logged in to facebook to find one new message from Kate. “Thank you so much. Please, never reply to any of his messages because I know he will text you. I beg you. Please save my relationship I have a one week old kid with him”